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Modern parenting has confused love with leadership, and our kids are paying the price

The Parent Hope Project

Key Facts:

Published by: Bloomsbury Publishing

Publish date: 9 July 2026

Format: Hardback

 

New book - The Parenting Paradox by Dr Jenny Brown - challenges the anxious, child-focused parenting culture shaping today’s families.

Australian family therapist and founder of the Parent Hope Project, Dr Jenny Brown, is calling time on one of modern parenting’s most deeply held beliefs: that more love, more attention and more intervention will lead to better outcomes for children.

In her new book, The Parenting Paradox: Loving Our Children by Giving Them Space to Grow, Dr Brown argues that while love is essential, it’s not enough. And in many cases, it’s being expressed in ways that are unintentionally fuelling anxiety, dependence and disconnection within families.

“Parents have been led to believe that constant involvement, monitoring and emotional attunement are the hallmarks of good parenting,” says Dr Brown. 

“But what I see in my clinical work is that this intensity often creates the very problems parents are trying to prevent, and many parents now feel responsible for constantly analysing their child’s emotional world and managing their distress.”

Drawing on over four decades of clinical experience in child and adolescent mental health, as well as her work training professionals and supporting families across Australia, the US, Canada and Asia, Dr Brown brings a broader social and relational lens to parenting.

Rather than offering parenting techniques or ‘quick win’ tips, The Parenting Paradox challenges the broader culture of intensive parenting, which has trained parents to constantly scan for problems and intervene.

At the heart of the book is what Dr Brown calls the “worry cycle”, a pattern where parental anxiety fuels children’s reactivity, which in turn reinforces the parent’s concern, creating a self-perpetuating loop.

“The more we focus on fixing or managing our children, the more we can inadvertently keep them stuck. When parents step out of that cycle, children have space to develop resilience and independence,” she says.

The book introduces practical, thought-provoking concepts including:

• How to break free from the worry and conflict cycles that drive family stress

• The power of taking an ‘I’ stance, a calm, grounded position that allows parents to lead rather than react

• Why overparenting in daily life and underparenting online is creating new challenges for families

• How rebuilding community and intergenerational connections can support children’s wellbeing

• How parents can partner with schools to achieve the best outcomes for their children

Importantly, The Parenting Paradox goes beyond simply criticising “helicopter parenting”. It offers something often missing from the conversation:

• A deeper understanding of how we arrived at today’s intensive parenting culture

• Insight into the mental health pressures shaping families today

• And a clear, practical pathway for parents who feel like they’ve tried everything, but nothing is working

“This is about becoming a steadier, more confident presence in your child’s life,” she says. “When parents grow, families grow.”

With rising rates of anxiety in both parents and children, The Parenting Paradox offers a timely and much-needed reframe, one that moves beyond quick fixes and empowers parents to take a long-term, sustainable approach to family life.

 

About us:

About the author:

Dr. Jenny Brown has been a dedicated leader in child, couple, and family mental health for over four decades, working across Australia, the United States, and the UK. With a career grounded in family therapy and Bowen family systems theory, her long-term focus has been strengthening families, primarily by empowering parents to support their children’s emotional and psychological well-being. 

Through decades of clinical practice and research, Jenny noticed a troubling trend: parents often feel sidelined in their child’s mental health care, losing trust in their own instincts. Her PhD research explored this dynamic and led to the creation of the Parent Hope Project - a groundbreaking suite of resources designed to restore parental agency and build lasting confidence in navigating their child’s challenges.

Jenny is the author of the widely read Growing Yourself Up: How to Bring Your Best to All of Life’s Relationships. She has authored several publications, including Facilitating Parents’ Agency in Child and Adolescent Mental Health: Helplessness to Hope. Jenny is the founder and director emeritus of the Family Systems Institute in Sydney, and her contributions to family therapy have earned her recognition and awards in Australia and the United States.

Find out more at: https://www.jennybrown.info/ 

Contact details:

Media contact: Erin Huckle, [email protected] / 0432 213 506